


Obsession, Compulsion

by leooX



Series: Anxiety!Josh, OCD!Tyler [2]
Category: Twenty One Pilots
Genre: Anxiety, Anxiety Disorder, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-20
Updated: 2016-10-20
Packaged: 2018-08-23 16:07:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8333905
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/leooX/pseuds/leooX
Summary: Tyler Joseph has Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, and it's not in control. Josh tries to make it better sometimes.





	

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first Joshler fic ever and also my first on here so be kind pls

Left. Right. Left. Pause. Right. Left.  
Repeat.  
Tyler made sure to count his steps quietly as he makes his way to Josh's house.  
He had been diagnosed with OCD when he was 16, just two years ago, and it consumed his daily life. It was considered one of the most crippling disorders to have, and who could disagree? 

Before he left his house, he turned the TV sound up by 4, back down by 2, and back up by 6, before he could turn it off, placing the remote beside a book on the coffee table, shifting it thrice before he decided it was safe.  
Closed his eyes, counted to thirty one as he stood in front of the door of his house, then he opened it (making sure it took only 8 seconds to do so) and put his left foot on the first step and counted "thirty two".  
Locking the door, he closed it and pulled the handle down, back up, down again and locked it before he turned around and was on his way.

Now, as he thought of something other than steps, he messed up, forgetting to place his right foot down twice. He sighed in frustration, turning around to walk back to the road he had crossed and starting over.

"Just don't think about it" he mumbled to himself, he could see Josh's house at the end of the path which was reassuring. 

|-/

It took another 20 minutes until he arrived, visibly shaking with tears threatening to spill. It should have took five, he mentally cursed himself, clicking his fingers against his thigh and breathing heavily as he stood with his eyes closed outside of the door.

He kept messing up. His steps wrong. He saw a tree that was changing colours, it was Autumn, and a bird with a red chest which sat beside a cluster of orange leaves- he'd had to stop for three minutes to stop himself panicking about it.  
Then came the intrusive thoughts- 'jump!' 'A lorry- jump!' The ones that hurt the most spoke about Josh. Always him.  
It wasn't that he wanted to die in that moment. Or hurt Josh ever... He just. Obsessed. 

He was trying to calm before Josh opened the door, but he heard it open before he could knock and he quickly snapped "No!-" and Josh shut it again, hastily.  
He took a shaky breath and knocked three times, with his hand on the handle, before stepping back two steps.  
Josh opened up again, smiling sweetly, even as he saw Tylers panic. Tyler half smiled and stepped in, closing the door behind him without looking at it, letting out the breath he always held in as he did so.

"You alright, Tyler?" Josh asked softly, Tyler clenched his jaw and nodded. Josh pulled a face "C'mon, then" he gestured to the front room where he had the Television set up so Tyler wouldn't have to.  
'So you wouldn't waste his time...' he told himself, closing his eyes briefly and sitting on the left set of the black couch. Josh picked up the remote, biting his lip and sitting beside him.

Tyler hated to think of how Josh's face made his thoughts run.  
He had equal plugs in both ears, but a nose ring on his left nostril. Uneven.

Tyler was tapping his leg, in code. Not that he or Josh knew what code- he just did it. He didn't pay attention to the film as he blocked the ideas that he obsessed over, starting to bite his already shredded nails.  
"Tyler..." Josh warned, looking at how Tylers fingers were bleeding. The blood gave Tyler a release of thoughts. Not the he did it intentionally, but it was his own blood dripping down his hand and not Josh's.

He shook his head at Josh, noting how Josh started to rapidly bounce his leg. Anxiety. Josh had anxiety and Tyler gave him it.  
'Selfish. You're so selfish.'

"Josh- I. Sorry. It just took me so long to get here, stuff happened. It was wrong. What if I died? What if you did ? Because I forgot to f-fucking walk right?" He rushed, his breathing uneven. Josh sighed and put his arm over Tyer, making sure his hand didn't touch the crook where Tylers arm pit met his body, or he'd be pushed away. 

"Tyler... It's okay," he soothed "Look,you did well. I'm here, so are you, you did really good Tyler" he pressed a chaste kiss to the others forehead and ran his hand over Tylers cheek.

Tyler nodded shakily and put his hand down on his knee, letting himself be pulled into the hug but not returning it.  
Josh pulled back and picked up Tylers bleeding hand, kissing them. Tyler was shaking and put his head into Josh's chest, nuzzling the warm, sturdy surface, letting himself be laid down with Josh and accepting the comfort he offered.

"I love you" he whispered to Josh, not even noticing that the three bottles of different beverages on the fire place weren't set into order of volume.


End file.
